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No dread, no regret, no resent

March 24, 2010

My mantra for the past few weeks has been, “Just for today, I will not dread, regret, resent”.  What an amazing few weeks it has been!

I simply resolved at the beginning and throughout each day, to avoid wherever possible these three pitfalls of thinking.  Any time my mind migrated there, I would simply immediately redirect to something positive.  I would not join in the internal dialogue in my head that would say things like,

“Man, today is going to be a tough day”, (dread)

“You really should have chosen a career as __________ “, (regret)

“I really hate that guy”, (resent)

You get the picture, I am sure.  I simply found myself drifting into these thought paths more than I cared to and to no practical end.  I was the only one who was hurt when I did.  Well, initially anyway.  Then I would hurt others by my behaviour that resulted from the emotional funk from dreading, resenting, and regretting.

And who am I to question God as to why the path I took was not the right one for me?  How do I know I am not exactly where I need to be and can be of most value to myself, God, my family, and humanity?

Who’s to say that if one of the things I regret not doing would not have been my undoing?  Who’s to say that if my ‘ship came in’ the way my thoughts felt it should have, that I wouldn’t have sunk it?

Life is amazing today.  As long as I remain in today and grateful for everything.

There is no place for dread, regret, or resentment in a life that, as Don Draper puts it, “Moves in only one direction, forward”.

Ciao.

Chaz

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12 comments

  1. Thanks for this Chaz. I’m going to give it a try.


    • Try simply to not take the bait. Don’t join the arguments inside your head. They lead nowhere. Choose another thought to fill your mind with. You wont be missing much but stepping out of the negative dialogue.


  2. Wow, that’s amazing perspective and a great way of looking at life. I just sent out a tweet with your post and want to print this one up and put it at work as a constant reminder! Life is amazing, you’re right!!


    • Hey Jolene… it is a lot better way than I used to. I was a sucker for an argument or bitch-fest in my own head. I could always be drawn in and drawn down. Now, I essentially just step out of the room where the negative dialogues are happenining. Even thought the room is my own head. I simply start a positive dialogue instead. Gratitude is always a great place to start. If the rest of my thoughts want to grumble, they can do it without me… without my consious mind that is.

      Treating my habitual negative thoughts as if they were other people has really helped me compartmentalize them. The result is that they come to visit a lot less often. And when they do, they usually don’t make it past the front porch. I seldom let them in. And if they sneak in, I shoo them out immediately.

      Ciao.

      Chaz


      • Wow, that is a great way of beating down the negativity, I admire that. I’m learning that though I am generally a positive person, I have some bad habits too, in terms of letting things frustrate, bother, annoy, or downright piss me off, and they’re usually so trivial, too, which makes it even LESS worth it! I need to kick that habit to the curb and follow something similar to this!


  3. […] had a fantastic post this week on his new mantra – “Just for today, I will not dread, regret, resent” – […]


    • Ya Jolene… kicking a habit of thought for me has essentially been a repetetive process of retraining patterns. Not unlike forging a new path through the forest. The old one is familiar and comfortable even if it does lead us to the edge of and over a cliff.

      The first time we take a new path is slow and cumbersome. Awkward and unfamiliar. But eventually, through repetition, it is intuitive and habitual. Although the new habit is one of design and choice and hopefully positive and beneficial.

      Its working. Big time.

      Ciao.

      Chaz


      • That’s awesome, glad to hear it. Hopefully it’s not too slow a path for me, but time will tell 🙂


  4. Just passing through and wanted to say Hi! Someone once said that we find serenity when we give up looking for a better past! Have a good one!!


    • Well put Greg. Thanks.


  5. We all need to take life just one day at a time. But that ain’t always easy.

    Thanks for the Reminder! 🙂


    • Hey Patience… thanks for stopping by. A day at a time is as much as I can manage… sometimes, I cut it down to 15 minutes.

      Ciao.

      Chaz



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