Refining our skills

May 30, 2009

How do we get better at things?  The only way I have discovered is by practice and experience. 

I have found that life’s trials give us skill-refining practice and experience. 

How does a boxer get better?  Is it not through sparring?  And through fights with other boxers?  I doubt if there is a boxer out there who ever got any better at his skill without going through much sparring and many fights.


Tiger Woods Masters 2009

What about golf?  Hasn’t Tiger Woods’ exceptional skill level created a new standard of achievement for today’s professional golfers?

I have been going through some hellish circumstances lately.  Work has been very challenging.  Our company is finally feeling the effects of this recession.

I have had sleepless nights, and grouchy moments.  Depression and anxiety have been knocking at my door a lot lately.

If ever there was a time to accept that this is a time to practice and refine my skills of recovery, this is it.  In fact, keeping a “what doesn’t kill us makes us stronger” mindset, actually makes the trials somewhat thrilling.

Just like Phil Mickelson and Geoff Ogilvy improving their games by playing head to head with Tiger Woods, maybe this is my time opportunity to strive to be better than I ever was.

Any dead fish can float down stream or be swept around by the tide.  But the strong can swim against the current.

So maybe this isn’t just tribulation.  Maybe this is just another training experience to become something better than I ever was.






  1. […] from: Refining our skills addiction, alcoholism, archives, blended-family, categories, chaz-nbspwho, depression, divorce, […]

  2. […] Refining our skills […]

    • Thanks Lores….

      I am in a city that has remained vibrant in spite of the downturn in the global economy. Yet we do have affected areas as per my current situation.

      It has finally come home to roost somewhat. Gladly though, every day that passes is a day closer to the turn-around.

      So will press on. And become stronger for the experience.



  3. The recession is hitting so many organisations and individuals so hard…but so pleased to read that you are keeping a positive mental attitude about these challenges.

    If life were always easy then you wouldn’t appreciate the good stuff right?



  4. hi chaz. i can’t picture you as grouchy! but i feel for your situation.

    i have been developing my skills of recovery, and every realization i have seems to come like a punch in the face. but, i have to learn things the hard way. maybe we all do.

    what i have learned so far is that i must constantly change, embrace suffering and learn from it, in order to move forward.

    thanks for posting.

  5. Blu….

    Grouchy? Oh ya. I can get grouchy as easy as the next guy. I suppose I just deal with it in a different way than I used to. And if I offend anyone with my grouchiness…. I make amends asap.

    The constant change you mention is what we end up doing when we are recovering. It is a long journey, but we reap benefits along the way that make it bearable.

    The pain is always worth something if we do not surrender to it and make bad decisions. But even if we do, we can still learn from mistakes.



  6. chaz- great post and so true. refining skills and redirecting thoughts and behaviors have been clutch in helping my recovery from my dreaded affair. ive recently been working on changing associations i have with certain things that trigger anxiety and pain and that seems to be working very well.

  7. Way to go MSM…. I have read some of your story on TV Exp’s blog. Glad you are finding a pathway through.

    It almost sounds trite to say that what doesnt kill us makes us stronger. Even if what the tough thing we are going through is our own doing.

    Yet value can be derived from all things. If we do something we regret, we have the unique opportunity to become someone better by it. I have discovered this on so many fronts.

    I would not be the husband, father, and manager I am today if I had not gone THROUGH the mistakes I made with drugs, booze, and flawed thinking.

    Yet re-directing my thinking to positive things helped me train in these better ways of thinking and living to the point of becoming a better person today.

    Glad life is moving forward for you. It unfolds a day at a time.

    See ya on the blogs.



Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: