Yes, we are working our way out of our deceptions. We bought into a lot of untruths and practiced them into well-rehearsed patterns of thought. Then we supported those thoughts with behaviours and got results that hurt us. So we applied the untruths all the more and thus the spiral of alcoholic self-destruction was formed. Or something like it I am sure.

I am so glad there are forces by which we can be drawn out of the accelerating spiral and given a chance to re-learn and recover.

To me, unquestionably, God as I understand Him, is merciful and powerful. In fact, it takes power to give mercy.

This is a fabulous journey. I feel blessed. I feel grateful. It is hard to cry in one’s soup by singing along with a sad song about lost love while being grateful.

Ciao.

Chaz

You are welcome. Thanks for your reply. I am enjoying the input from the others who have replied to you. It is very encouraging.
Keep up the good work.

Ya… I often wonder if we are sometimes trying to “help God out”. Meaning, acting on our good ideas rather than listening for direction. God informs us that obedience is preferred to sacrifice. This suggests to me that it is more important for us to find and follow God’s will than it is to make sacrifices for him of our own design and volition.

I suppose it is a fine line that we often cannot see.

In terms of helping others, I agree that we often have to just let them be dragged around. I know I went through that and I honestly do not know what else would have woken me up to my own powerlessness. I was clining to my own self-reliance and my self-reliance was dragging me all over the place yet getting me nowhere.

But only by being beaten by the futility and pain of it all did I ever let go and let God. And even having some enlightenment in this area, I am still tempted to take back what I surrendered to God. In fact, I have discovered surrender to be a continual and progressive process. We learn with practice how to surrender more and more. Just like we learned with practice how to be more and more self-reliant.

Thanks for the reply.

Will look for you on the boards.

Ciao.

Chaz

It’s great to hear your view on things. I agree totally with everything you have said and your responses. You appear to be a very matured individual. I believe you have learned through much experience which included much sufferings, as I have in life,and by God’s grace have come to an understanding and wisdom on many things.

I too have learned to walk the straight and narrow which results in unbelievable blessings. However, there was a time in much of my life in which I was a fool and very ignorant but again God’s mercy and grace patiently drew me out of my foolish ways into a better and more fulfilling life.

I have also come to the conclusion that, regardless of how much we want to prevent our loved ones from learning through suffering, it can’t be done. I heard a great example from a preacher who stated this, which really opened up an understanding that I had never had before. He said that in the scriptures when Jesus said ” No man comes unto Me unless My Father in heaven draws him”. The true meaning of the word draw is drags. So it really says, unless My Father in heaven DRAGSSSSSS him.

I know I had to be dragged and from my observation in life thus far, I don’t know anyone else who has come unto Jesus without being dragged. We fought with all our might to live our own way as others are doing now. So we must learn to be about our Father’s business and let Him do the work of convicting others and dragging them out of their hell hole into the light.

Have we inadvertently created grief worship or grief addiction?

Yes we have. We alcoholics (particularly clinically depressed one’s like me) like to create these things out of a misunderstanding of life as it happens to us. With the help of the steps to recovery, and in my situation, Dharma practice (my cognitive therapy) the picture becomes clearer. “Stay tuned after a brief announcement from our sponsors” LOL.

Thanks for the post. I enjoy reading your blog .. you help me.

Namaste

Ok… yes, agreed. A greater context and wider viewpoint can certainly change our perspective on pain due to loss.

In fact, perhaps this is the point I am trying to make.

Have we hyper-focused culturally on the drama of pain of loss of a love relationship? Have we inadvertently created grief worship or grief addiction?

I too have found great reprieve by expanding my perspective. I did a some cognitive behaviour therapy that showed me that I had some very painful habits of thought that were not rooted in much reality. Nor did they span much breadth of context.

Now, by putting things in a broader perspective, I do not panic as much at pain. I know that invariably, “this too shall pass” and that pain is part of life and usually happens as part of a journey to something greater.

Thanks for stopping by and sharing your thoughts.

A picture is becoming clearer.

Ciao

Chaz

I agree that sadness is simply part of life. And I agree with Karl Jung that the sad times provide the contrast that make the happy times shine brighter.

I wonder if what I am referring to with our music culture is the over-emphasis of the hurt times.

I wonder if what is prodding my thinking is the degree to which the repetition of the theme of loss and pain don’t subconsciously set us up to expect and therefore unknowingly create loss out of our love situations. Or to pack it in too easy cause thats all we heard about on the radio growing up.

Points taken none the less.

Ciao.

Chaz

Food for thought:

Even a happy life cannot be without a measure of darkness, and the word “happy” would lose its meaning if it were not balanced by sadness. (Carl Jung)

It happens, but does it need to be that way?

Are we perpetuating heartbreak by making it such a central theme?

Are we creating a heartbreak culture?

Is art defining culture in this way?